A citywide hunt to locate a large quantity of missing tile, intended for a graciously appointed new construction project, has been located on a historic home in Chicago's Ravenswood Manor neighborhood. Realtors have been indundating the owner with promises of a high sales price due to the rare opportunity to live among such ornate detail. Personal injury attorneys have joined their well liked brethren in soliciting the reclusive owner in hopes of securing the role of lead counsel in the impending case of, "Chicago v. The Porch that Maims."
Ravenswood Manor TAGS agent, albany park, American four square, bungalow, buyer, chicago, historic, lincoln square, new construction, polish, porch, ravenswood manor, realtor, seller, slip and fall, tile, trendy, why When asked why he wouldn't lower the rent on his Andersonville storefront to allow a start-up business a short term lease rather than keep the space vacant for months, the seasoned owner replied, "I'd rather take the losses on my taxes." When asked further if he felt his empty storefront was a blight on the neighborhood, he responded bluntly, "f*#k blight", before continuing, "It's my building not the neighborhood's."
Andersonville TAGS agent, andersonville, chicago, edgewater, gut renovation, high rents, IRS, landlord, listing, mixed-use building, ravenswood, real estate, realtor, storefront, taxes, tenant, toilet, Trump, two flat As the high-end single family home home boom continues unabated throughout the Northside of Chicago, builders are struggling to find details that will help their generic designs stand out. Coffered ceilings and wi-fi mudrooms are not enough. OneAndersonville developer was kind enough to preserve a traditional brick two flatrental building by converting it into aluxury single family home. But to appeal to the clientele who buy such properties, he constructed a minimalist inspired front porch, lovingly sprayed with the finest automotive primer.
Andersonville TAGS andersonville, brick, builder, buyers, chicago, design, developer, edgewater, high-end, luxury, minimalist, new construction, northside, porch, single-family home, tacky, traditional, two flat, hot market Home Inspectors and savvy realtors warn buyers to beware of the glitz. Check out the basement, they say, it's where you'll find the ugly truth.
Buyers of this Logan Square estate were astonished to discover an unsuspected horror: Unfairly traded non-artisanal coffee. Most revealed that they would be unable to occupy such a home. But one prospective Logan Square Immigrant noted, "he probably just stored his Ipsento Sumatran beans in there, great re-purposing man". Logan Square TAGS agent, artisanal, basement, bogeyman, bungalow, buyers, cafe, chock full o nuts, coffee, coffee can, estate, fair trade, hipster, home, home inspector, immigrant, irony, north side, re-purposing, realtor When purchasing a home, items such as appliances and lights are considered a part of the home unless a seller decides they want to keep them. But it isn't common for buyers to refuse a fixture. Until now.
The buyers of this turn of the century Garfield Park two flatdemanded that the reclaimed wood refrigerator be removed from the property by closing. They told undisclosed sources that they thought the reclaimed wood as a disgrace because it wasn't old enough, and that they would reclaim even older, more age appropriate wood for their non-stainless refrigerator. Garfield Park TAGS agent, buyers, chicago, closing, contract, Garfield Park, historic, home, house, property, real estate, realtor, reclaimed wood, refrigerator, seller, south side, stainless, trendy, turn of the century, two flat A Bridgeport family converted their two flat's basement into a drinking preparation center so their children could safely play while gaining exposure to the subterranean dwelling's future use. The little ones were told that the wall was a Southside piñata that they'll get to break open on their thirteenth birthdays.
Prospective home buyers were assured that the liquor bottles and glasses were suitable for children as young as nine but that all liquor remaining was to be transferred in As-Is condition. Bridgeport TAGS 2 flat, agent, As-Is, bar, basement conversion, Bill W, bridgeport, broker, buyers, children, contract, family room, home, liquor, listing, playroom, realtor, southside, transferred, two flat The sellers of this Portage Park bungalow read on the internet that a new president would foreclose on all homes older than fifty years in order to drive the economy with new construction condominium development. They also read something on the myth of climate change and decided to move to a state called Arizona.
Portage Park TAGS agent, blue line, brick, bungalow, chicago, clocks, condominium, home, internet, jefferson park, new construction, northwest side, obama, portage park, realtor, sellers, single family home, socialist, vintage Known around the neighborhood for his mason jar lamps and mixing bowl hats, the owner of this historic Andersonville homewas searching for a resourceful way to landscape. And when he found perfectly empty usable aluminum troughs surrounding hishouse, the owner just knew his neighbors would be so impressed by his latest repurposing project.
Andersonville TAGS agent, andersonville, buyer, chicago, downspout, edgewater, flooding, gutters, historic, home, house, Lakewood Balmoral, neighborhood, projects, rain garden, realtor, repurposing, seller, water damage Honoring the public's request to fall off the face of the earth,realtors have begun to outsource their traditional role as home guide and disseminator of the obvious. Buyers and sellers alike seem happy with the trend, anxiously awaiting the day when hell freezes over so they can enjoy a reduction in commission fees.
Rogers Park TAGS agent, buyers, chicago, commission, discount, edgewater, Edgewater Glen, fees, guide, hell, home, northside, outsourcing, public, real estate, realtor, red line, rogers park, sellers, signs, helvetica The elderly seller of this Albany Park bungalow could not understand why potential buyers (or grandchildren) of his family home kept urinating in the basement. Apparently, the owner didn't know that raccoons can't read.
Albany Park TAGS agent, albany park, basement, brown line, bungalow, buyers, chicago, chicago river, exterminator, lincoln square, north park, number 1, pee pee, piss, raccoon, real estate, realtor, seller, signs, urine |